It Ain’t Sexy

Diet culture phrases
by Debbie Peterson

“I’m on day six of my cleanse,” the woman said to her friend sitting next to her at the chiropractic office waiting room. She was probably in her 60’s, graying hair, comfortable clothing.

“Oh, how is it going?” The friend, probably around the same age,  turned to her and raised her eyebrows anticipating a response.

“Great! My sugar cravings are gone and I’m eating clean food. I’m hoping to take off ten pounds or so. At least, that’s what they advertised. I have two more weeks to go.”

I sat across from them in the waiting room, pretending to look at my phone while I listened. 

“I did a 30 day cleanse last year and lost seven pounds,” the friend said.

“Oh, that’s great!”

“I gained it all back. And then some. I mean it was really good. They had me eating vegetables and fruits and lean meats and brown rice. No gluten or dairy or soy or sugar, you know. I felt really good.”

Heard that one before. I considered looking up, seeing if they’d look back and then maybe tell them I’m a health and wellness coach. But they didn’t.

“But, you know, I didn’t keep it up. I did for a while, but it was just too hard, and my family was annoyed with me.”

“Yeah, that’s hard.”

I so wanted to help these women. They were victims of the diet culture and I so wanted to rescue them, tell them that they just needed to . . . well, that’s not really what I do. I can’t rescue people OR tell them what to do. I’m a health coach and it’s my job to guide people in finding what’s right for themselves, not by telling them what I think they should do, but by asking them what they know they need to do. 

I know, it ain’t sexy. 

We all know what we need, though many of us doubt ourselves. We don’t trust that we know enough about health and wellness to do the “right” thing. So, we search out there for answers. Want to take off a few pounds? Lose that belly? Well, you sure will find “answers” out there and promises that will claim to change your life for the better. You’ll lose that weight, have that energy, look younger! Just drink this smoothie or do this 21 day cleanse. 

I’m not trying to be righteous. There are wonderful products and programs in the marketplace, for sure. There are people like me who truly are trying to get people to feel better and there are people who truly believe the product they are selling will help you. And maybe it will.

But mostly, what’s in the market are quick fixes and false promises. They want to make it easy for you. We all want it to be easy. Of course we do. Who wouldn’t?

You know, though, that for you to really feel good, look great, sleep better, be stronger, lose that weight and keep it off, you have to work at it. And that ain’t sexy.

If you didn’t stop reading this, then maybe you’re past all those false promises that the diet culture hands out at discount prices. Maybe you’ve realized that it DOES take work and time to get the results you want. And you also realize that the results aren’t really the focus–the process is. Because when we get the results, we don’t just stop. You’ve tried that before. Lost that weight. Felt good. Had energy. Looked great. And then it all went away because you stopped, or stalled, or took a different path following someone or something you thought would be the better answer.

We aren’t making promises. We can’t. Because it’s up to you. Our clients make promises to themselves and we help keep them accountable. We support them, cheer them on, guide them, and most importantly give them unconditional positive regard. 

And we see results. All kinds of results. It’s what keeps us going, giving us the motivation to keep at our work as coaches and not falling into the trap of promising things we can’t deliver, just to make a few bucks.

The reason we became health coaches is because we really want people to feel better. We are also on our own paths trying to feel better. There is always something to be working on if you believe in the growth mindset. We help people adopt this as well, to keep moving forward and so that, one person at a time, our world becomes a healthier place.

If this blog resonates with you, if you’re confused about how to go about feeling better, if you want direction for your wellness path, or if you just want to be held accountable, we’re here.